...because as I was walking back to the hotel from the casino security office Junior says he needs an officer to go to the café to respond to some drunken cowgirls.
Rich and I get there at the same time and a cute Food and Beverage assistant supervisor greets us.
"What's going on, Karen?"
"Those cowgirls over there. They're sleeping and taking off their shoes."
"You mean those over there?" I asked, pointing across the room. "The one's in the cowboy hats?"
Karen nodded.
"Nothing gets past you guys, does it?"
Rich and I laughed.
"We're trained professionals, Karen."
The cowgirls were, indeed, taking a very leisurely approach to their meal. Shoes were off, and some were sleeping. Rich and I walk up.
"Uh oh," one cowgirl said. "They called security."
"Not only that," I said. "There's two of us."
"You're all in big trouble," Rich announced.
"Do we have to put our shoes back on?"
I nodded solemnly.
"You gotta finish your vegetables, too," Rich said.
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Boy, the employee dining room was at its worst tonight, absolutely the worst employer-provided meals since the Gulags. You could've played handball with the chicken fingers, the egg rolls were cold and tasted like a sponge and whatever the beef dish was was gray and everything was old and 90 percent gone besides. Ted even requested the med bag a few minutes into his meal.
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(Lunch) can wait, of course. X-Ray will be there, but I had not yet had a call of my own and I'm near the elevators and I end up being the first one on the floor. Right as I turn down the hall - and this was pretty funny - the door to the stairwell opens and Lee enters and right after that X-Ray, who had taken the maid's elevators, comes bursting through the maid's room door. If you listen closely you can hear Eye of the Tiger playing in the background.
It's Lee's squeal so we let him make the decision. He chooses to lay back and let X-Ray and I handle it.
"You guys take it; I'll wait right here," Lee said, lounging against a wall, no doubt conserving his energy for when we have to break the door down.
The tee vee is going pretty loud. No one answers X-Ray's knock, so, as if my knocks have more authority, I try and also get no response. We look to Lee for guidance; he's texting his girlfriend. Lee considers the matter for a few heart-stopping seconds.
"We're going in," he says.
Lee's the type of leader who takes the point in these situations. He inserts his master key, opens the door, and makes entry. X-Ray follows and I got everyone's back by making sure the can is code four.
Lee immediately finds the tee vee and turns the volume down. We look around the room for something interesting to look at - like thong panties or a camera so we can take our pictures of our cocks - find nothing, and exit the room.
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