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The Human Zoo/August 25, 2011
By Gaylon Kent
The Writer's Shack
Notes from around the Human Experience...
OH JESUS H: Texas Governor and Republican presidential hopeful Rick Perry became the latest presidential contender to sign a pledge to do everything he can to end abortion. The pledge calls for using federal action and appointing anti-abortionists to top federal positions.
Six other GOP hopefuls have signed the pledge, too, including our treasured Ron Paul, though we are prepared to give Paul a free pass on this one, because Dr. Paul used to deliver babies for a living and can be expected to have strong feelings on the matter.
Dry, Technical Matter: The pledge is put out by the Susan B. Anthony List, a pro-life organization. Your sole value to them is based on whether or not you are pro-life, too, and agree with everything they say.
Fly In The Ointment: Fabulous. Just what this country needs: single issue zealots whose sole basis for judging a candidate is that candidate's stance on their fave issue and whack jobs politicians who pander to them.
Every registered voter should go stand in the corner for putting up with this. Single issue whack jobs - a term we do not throw around lightly here at the Writer's Shack - making candidates sign narrow, special interest-specific pledges in exchange for the inevitable campaign contributions is so against the spirit of democracy it isn't even funny. We get it because we put up with it.
Go In Peace, Serve The Lord: Perry is no dummy though. He knows this nation has a history of electing Texas governors of no particular substance who pander to religious zealots and we can expect him to do everything except maybe toss communion wafers to the crowd at campaign stops.
We're Right, You're Wrong, Thank You In Advance: Those associated with the Susan B. Anthony List see nothing wrong with their pledge. This, from their website:
The purpose of the pledge is to give the Presidential candidates a clear picture of what is expected should they be elected to the White House…"
More Oh Jesus H: This is supremely galling and every thinking citizen should take offense at the pretense implicit in this statement: my personal moral beliefs are superior to yours!
Well, no, they're not. Mine certainly aren't any better than yours, either, and what this country does not need, but gets and continues to tolerate, are single issue zealots insisting their moral and/or religious beliefs be public policy.
You know what, though? They shouldn't. Certainly, I am obligated to respect your religious beliefs. In fact, as we've noted here, we're veterans here at the Writer's Shack and we spent that time defending your right to believe as you see fit.
OTOH: We did not, however, spend four years defending your specific beliefs, and we are under no obligation either to believe them or follow them ourselves.
A Question: Hey, is it possible to have practical, sane discussion about abortion? We don't exactly favor abortion here, but you can prefer it not happen and still have a rational outlook about its legality.
Get Your Official Writer's Shack Policy Right Here: Humans have been terminating pregnancies since well before the birth of Christ. Some cultures had herbs for it and those that didn't utilized sharp objects or physical trauma.
This doesn't make abortion right or wrong, it merely points out that we've been terminating pregnancies for an awfully long time and no matter what we legislate people are going to continue to terminate pregnancies. It's the way the world is built. About ninety percent of abortions are because for whatever reason it is inconvenient to have a kid and those aren't going to stop simply because abortion is illegal.
So keep it legal. Criminalizing abortion is not going to stop it and this country does not need another class of criminal. Keeping them legal will also keep them safe and out of the back alleys.
Please Pass The Dry, Technical Matter: The Centers for Disease Control reports that since 1973 over 50 million legal abortions have been performed. There are a couple of ways to look at this:
Leading Off: On the one hand, that's 50 million kids tha didn't score their first touchdown or give their first piano recital and who knows if any of them would have been the geniuses that showed mankind the way to bigger and better things.
OTOH: These pregnancies weren't ended because the kids were wanted. So that's 50 million kids that weren't born into homes where they weren't wanted or that couldn't afford them or otherwise born to parents, or more likely a parent, that would have to struggle to give them a life that offered even a glimmer of hope for something good.
GREAT MOMENTS IN GALILEO: Noted astronomer and future house arrest confinee Galileo shows one of his first telescope to assorted lawmakers in Venice on this date in 1609.
This wasn't the first telescope, though. Galileo had stolen the idea from the Dutch, who had invented it the previous year. Galileo got wind of it and, Galileo being Galileo, had improved on it considerably. The following January Galileo would discover what he thought were stars, but when they didn't act like stars he concluded they were moons orbiting Jupiter.
Fly In The Ointment: While he built the very best telescopes of the time, Galileo, like all opticians of the era, had to deal with glass that was filled with bubbles and other impurities, which caused stars to look blurry.
Get Out Your History Books: Playing at what was then known as Cubs Park, the Chicago Cubs and Philadelphia Phillies establish the major league record for most runs scored in a game by both teams on this date in 1922.
Oh Yeah:The Cubs won 26-23 and the line score looked like the winning lottery numbers: 26 runs, 25 hits, five errors and nine left on base for the Cubs, and 23 runs, 26 hits, four errors and a man-sized 16 left on base for the Phillies.
The Cubs got 10 in the second and 14 in the fourth and led 25-6 after four. The Phillies got eight in the eighth and six in the ninth, leaving the bases loaded in their final at-bat.
Can't Anybody Here Play This Game? Of the 49 runs, only 30 were earned. Maddeningly, neither of our major league record books carries records for most unearned runs in a game and further research on the matter was inconclusive.
FunFacts: It would take the Phillies ten more games to score 23 runs. The Cubs would need just five games to get their next 26 runs.
Thought For The Day: Hope is a good breakfast, but it is a bad supper. - Francis Bacon
Answer To The Last Trivia Question: Zach Taylor, in the final year of a four-year stint, was the St. Louis Browns manager in 1951.
Today's Stumper: What's the deal with pro-lifers? - Answer next time!
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