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The Daily Dose/March 23, 2008
By Gaylon Kent
The Writer's Shack
Editor's Note: Pics will return!
Stop us if you'd heard this before: Notes from around the Human Experience!
FREE TIBET NOW. THANK YOU: Tibet's struggle to free their Chinese shackles continues, although since the Chinese are cracking on the pesky media, little is known for sure.
The official government death toll was raised to 18 Sunday, and unofficial totals are significantly higher, though independent observers have not been let into Tibet to verify the governments claims - or Tibetan claims, for that matter. But you don't have to be Confucius to deduce that the Chinese are doing everything necessary to restore order in the country they have occupied since 1951.
All Aboard! The Chinese government - obviously anxious to sway public opinion - even produced a list of governments that it claimed supported their Tibetan smack down. Known freedom lovers such as North Korea, Russia, Syria, Vietnam, Belarus and Fiji head the list, which also includes Benin. It is also using conciliatory phrases, such as referring to the Dali Lama as "a wolf in monks clothing" and saying they will "resolutely crush" the Tibetan revolt.
FunFact: The official motto for the Beijing Games is "One World, One Dream". Maybe organizers are referring to every persons dream to be occupied and repressed and have their culture and religion destroyed by a Communist invader.
A Question: When did 'ahead of' replace 'before' in the national vernacular? Every other report on this mess refers to the revolt happening 'ahead of' the Beijing Games.
A Lesson: Thomas Jefferson, a pretty handy sort with the old quill and ink, said "The most valuable of all talents is never using two words when one will do."
Conclusion: The Writer's Shack hereby issues an immediate call for all persons in the several states to cease using "ahead of" and return to using "before" as the word of choice when referring to something preceding, or happening prior to, something else.
A Voice In The Wilderness: Since previous communiqués demanding the legalization of both whatever athletes want to put into their bodies and prostitution have been ignored so far, we aren't expecting a whole lot action on this one, either.
A Threat: Comply with our demands or the bunny gets it. Happy Easter!
ON THIS DATE: In 1775, Patrick Henry gave a speech to the Virginia House of Burgesses. In this speech he may, or may not, have said, "Give me liberty, or give me death". The first published account of the speech did not appear until 1817 and this was written by a well-meaning soul named William Wirt who based his account either people who heard the speech or people who knew someone who heard the speech, and these people were working from memory and not any written source materials, so who knows.
Founding Father Team Coverage: Not even Thomas Jefferson, who was there, was altogether sure what he'd heard, writing "I have asked myself, when he ceased, 'What the devil has he said?' and could never answer the inquiry, ahead of the Declaration of Independence."
Tough Crowd: On this date, in 1801, the Tsar of Russia, Paul I was assassinated when some malcontent ex-officers stormed into his bedroom and, when he refused to sign abdication papers, was hit with a sword, then strangled, and then, just for funsies, trampled.
Up, Up And Away: On this date, in 1965, NASA launches Gemini 3, the United States' first two-man space flight. Commanded by Gus Grissom and piloted by John Young, Gemini 3 spent four hours and 52 minutes in space and orbited Earth three times. Young, who would later fly to the moon twice, walk on it once and is the only person to fly on Gemini, Apollo and space shuttle missions, would liven matters up by sneaking a corned beef sandwich and some chicken into space, though with the danger presented by crumbs to the spacecraft's electronic gear, it was quickly restowed. Young was mildly reprimanded and future crews were advised not to do this again.
GOOD LUCK WITH THAT: Taiwan, another perennial China fave, elected Ma Ying-jeou as president Saturday. Ma ran on a platform of easing relations with China, who still considers Taiwan as part of their country despite the fact nobody else in the world does.
"Certainly we would like to start preliminary contact with the mainland on how a peace treaty could be signed. [But] we already said very clearly if we are to negotiate a peace treaty they have to remove the missiles targeted against Taiwan."
GOOD LUCK WITH THAT II: Liberia is attempting to conduct its first census since 1984. It's having problems though.
Go Figure: One, government supplies were delayed in getting to the census takers. Two, once they got in the field, census takers discovered that a significant number of towns and villages that were on the map in 1984 have been either destroyed or deserted thanks to years of civil war, which, by the by, has also left most of the population poor and illiterate.
It's Got A Good Beat And You Can Dance To It: The government also enlisted on of Liberia's top singers, Juli Endee, to sing a song urging every Liberian who has the strength to "stand up and be counted" because this census "is for development, not for taxes" or letting the government know where its opponents live.
Answer To The Last Trivia Question: The last trivia question was rhetorical. Mankind may or may not be going straight to hell in a hand basket. We personally think we're more or less doing all right, but any country whose inhabitants watch four and half hours of tee vee everyday and where just over ten percent of young Americans couldn't even spot America on a map is squandering its existence.
Today's Trivia Question: What is the only non-American capital city named after a US president? - Answer next time!
Threats? Recipes? Trivia question answers? Email The Writer's Shack Here!
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