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The Human Zoo/October 7, 2011
By Gaylon Kent
The Writer's Shack
Notes from around The Human Experience...
UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL: This is a column and not a blog, so we don't usually concern ourselves with local ballot measures here at The Human Zoo. But we recently relocated to Steamboat Springs, Colorado, and there is an interesting measure on the November ballot: should the local sales tax, currently a man-sized 8.4 percent, be raised a quarter of a percent to help subsidize a program that subsidizes airlines that fly into town in the winter. Money from the tax would be used to guarantee even more seats in the future.
In 2011 the airline program provided the airlines with guarantees for about 118,000 seats and paid out $1.9 million, as airlines flew at about 70 percent of capacity. It's run by a partnership consisting of a consortium of local hotels, known as Ski Corp, the city, the chamber of commerce and assorted local business. Part of the funding comes from a two percent lodging tax.
And You Wonder Why You Don't Get Invited To More Parties: So, while nobody outside of town or some airline board rooms really care about Referendum 2B, it does bring up one of those tedious theory-of-government questions we are so fond of here: are taxpayers responsible for ensuring a profit for private businesses?
Well, no, of course we're not, although the federal government subsidizes flights into small airports all over the country. I mean, I'd like to sell a certain number of books, how about a modest sales tax to ensure I make a proper living off Swords In The Narthex, The Regular Guys and Backstairs at the Monte Carlo: A Vegas Memoir?
Fly In The Ointment: Well, readers of my books don't provide much public benefit - outside of being uncommonly well-read. They don't spend money in restaurants or stay in hotels. Tourists do. This is a tourist town and with tourists there isn't a whole lot going on here, and without the subsidies the airlines wouldn't fly into town as often, if at all, because the routes otherwise are not that profitable.
So what does a voter do? Make a stink about it, or do you tell yourself this is a very nice to live, mainly because people like to ski here, and set aside your big-picture government objections?
By The By: The question was rhetorical. We are not providing an answer.
HUT, HUT HIKE: We're not entirely sure what the hell happened, but official Writer's Shack faves Mount Union barely beat Ohio Northern last Saturday 14-6. The game wasn't decided until a late turnover by the Polar Bears, and was played on a wet, muddy field.
But this is what the great teams do: they win the close ones on the road, against a ranked opponent, not that our Purple Raiders have had a whole lot of close games - on the road or otherwise - lately. It was the closest Mount Union regular season win since a 28-21 win vs. Capital in 2009.
Break Down Segment: This week our Purple Raiders, who have won ten (10) NCAA Division III football titles over the years, host Marietta. Mount union leads the series 40-8-1, including a 20-0 win the first meeting in 1933 and a 28-14 smack down last year. Marietta is 1-3, 0-3 in the Ohio Athletic Conference. The Pioneers opened the season with a 32-24 win over Thiel College.
Standings Check: Our Purple Raiders currently sit atop the OAC standings with equally 3-1 - at least until they play Mount Union - Muskingum. Should Muskingum remain undefeated, highly doubtful, considering they aren't Official Writer's Shack Faves, the would lose to Mount Union in the final game of the season on November 12.
Numbers Racket: Mount Union is 157-6 this century. Head coach "Legendary" Larry Kehres is now ninth on the NCAA's career win list with 307. Next up - and this is rather poignant since the D-III title game is named after him - is Amos Alonzo-Stagg at 314 wins.
The School From Up North: Two-time defending national champion Wisconsin-Wherever also had a squeaker last week, hanging on to beat UW-Platteville 34-14. It was the Weasels 34th straight win. This week UW-Wherever travels to UW-River Falls.
Dry, Technical Matter: Mount Union is a statistical juggernaut this season, ranking in the top ten in no less than six (6) official NCAA stat categories, including a highest ranking of number two in Turnover Margin.
OTOH: Despite being top-ranked and unbeaten and - whoo-hoo - two-time defending national champions, UW-Wherever is having a tough go of it on the stat sheet, showing how weak the inbreeding known as the Wisconsin Intercollegiate Athletic Conference is. UW-Wherever ranks in the top ten in only one official NCAA stat category, Scoring Defense, where they rank only seventh, giving up an average of 8.75 points per game.
ME FIRST! Nevada Republicans announced Wednesday they would move the date of their caucus from February 18 to January 14. While Nevada won't have the first caucus or primary in the country, it will be the first in the west.
Eff This Noise: Nevada Republicans were so eager to be at the head of line they did this despite the fact it will cost them half the delegates to the Republican National Convention because the fall outside of dates specified by the Republican National Committee.
The ramifications are significant because Iowa and New Hampshire have state laws mandating their caucus and primary be the first in the nation. New Hampshire's law dictates their primary be held at least seven days before the following primary or caucus, so their primary cannot happen before January 7. Iowa may well have their caucus in December
Sigh: The BCS national championship football game is scheduled for January 9. College football and the presidential primary season now overlap. This says something. We're not entirely sure what, but we're certain it's not good.
WHAT THE HELL'S GOING ON HERE? This date, October 6, does not exist in 1582 in Italy, Portugal Spain and what is now Poland, due to their adoption of the Gregorian calendar. The calendar had been adopted the previous February by Pope Gregory XIII, one of the most useful things a pope has ever done.
Y2K1582: Because of the change, Thursday October 4, 1582 was followed by Friday October 15, 1582. The days were dropped to bring the calendar in line with the seasons.
Dry, Technical Matter: The Gregorian calendar has an error of one day every 3,300 years vis-à-vis the mean tropical year, which is a fancy way of saying the amount of time it takes Mr. Sun to return to the same point in a given season. The Julian calendar had an error of one day every 128 years.
The Long March Of Time: The Chicago Cubs blow the National League pennant on this date in 1984, losing game five of the National League Championship Series 6-3 to the San Diego Padres. The Cubs squandered a two games to nothing lead in the series and a 3-0 lead after two innings in the final game.
Thought For The Day: Let us laugh at fate. It might please her. - Winston Churchill.
Answer To The Last Trivia Question: Wilbur Wright's world air speed record was broken by Glen Curtiss in August, 1909 when he flew 43.36 miles per hour above Reims, France.
Today's Stumper: Of the nations that use the Gregorian calendar, which was the last to adopt it? - Answer next time!
Comments? Recipes? Complaints? Email the Writer's Shack here!
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