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The Daily Dose/August 6, 2008
By Gaylon Kent
The Writer's Shack
   
Notes from around the Human Experience...
GOD, YOU GUYS ARE PICKY: While we are glad to see the relentless pressure we applied to those Commie rascals in China produced a lifting of most Internet censorship for visiting reporters, there are still concerns, which shouldn't be a bulletin. Anybody who was expecting China to allow complete, unfettered access to the Internet to anyone was high.
Leading Off: We are pleased to report the Chinese did not disappoint. Estimates vary between a few hundred and over a thousand, but there are still assorted websites that are still inaccessible in China, be you a visiting reported or an ordinary Chinese person. The IOC - knee-deep in it with the Chinese, of course - is beaming like a proud parent, content to settle for whatever access the Chinese deem appropriate for reporters to write about athletic competition.
Stop Us If You've Heard This Before: The Great Firewall Of China! Still blocked are the usual evil sites of Tibet supporters, and those bastards at bbc.com plus whatever gayromeo.com happens to be. We're not sure; we haven't checked and, frankly, have no plans to.
We're Just Saying: But what happens if something happens? Say those rascals in Tibet or those evil members of Falun Gong (a spiritual discipline about as dangerous as the Girl Scouts and officially condemned by Chinese authorities) start whining about being persecuted and they are smacked down and reporters need information from whatever blocked sites or blogs they might deem useful?
Well, they're out of luck. The IOC long ago sold its soul to their worldwide sponsors so they could have two weeks of unfettered access to the third-largest economy in the world. Athletic competition merely happens to be the vehicle they use to deliver it.
That's A Relief: We are pleased to report the Writer's Shack is available in China. For now, at least.
Batting Second: Something else to look forward to is athletes coughing up their lungs after an event because the air in Beijing is downright noxious. Officials tried mightily to clean it up - it's bad enough to make Los Angeles look good - and they actually did; Beijing's air has been worse.
How Bad Is It? It's so bad Ethiopian marathoner Haile Gebrselassie withdrew from the race because of health concerns, though he will race in the 10,000 meters, which he won in 1996 and 2000. There are also reports athletes are considering skipping the Opening Ceremonies as well.
Of course, the IOC isn't worried. They fell short of proclaiming Beijing's air as crystal clear, but lied and said it was not a major concern. They also insisted that neither athletes or visitors were at risk.
"We used the World Health Organization standards for the evaluation," said an IOC mouthpiece. We'd name him/her, but identities of IOC officials are irrelevant now because they're just saying what the Chinese want them to say anyway. "Those standards are fairly tough to meet, but in many aspects, the Beijing area does,""
Oh, Jesus H: In many aspects? You're kidding me, the air's that good? And just how many aspects are talking about? Three? Four? Seventeen?
A Warm, Personal Remembrance: I grew up in Los Angeles. I can recall going out for recess on smoggy days where you couldn't see 10,000-foot mountains 35 miles away and having it hurt to breathe when you returned to the classroom. And that was just on a routine smoggy day doing nothing more strenuous than playing four square or smear the queer. There were some days the smog was so bad we weren't allowed to go outside for recess at all.
Hey Guys, Do You Plan Any Sports Coverage At All? Some. Team handball has interested us since we saw it played prior to the 1984 Games, and we are planning decathlon coverage as well, unless we decide to take another one of our famous hiatuses.
USA! USA! Uh, neither of the US handball teams qualified for this years Olympics.
The Lineup: China is in, as the host country, and Germany as the reigning world champion. Denmark, South Korea and Egypt are in as continental champions, as is Brazil, the only western hemisphere team and 2007 Pan Am Games champion. Poland, Iceland, France, Spain, Croatia and Russia placed first or second in Olympic qualifying tournaments to earn the final six spots. The ladies are sending China, Russia, Norway, Kazakhstan, Angola, Brazil, Germany, Sweden, Romania, Hungary, France and South Korea.
What The Hell Is Team Handball? Team handball, called handball in the rest of the world, is an indoor game played on a court that's about a third larger than a basketball court. There are goals on each end and there are seven players on a team and teams play two 30-minute halves. The ball is about the size of a volleyball and teams score upwards of 20 goals a game. There is a circle six meters from the goal where only the goalie is allowed, though other players may handle the ball in the air above the circle. There is also a dashed circle at nine meters, the purpose of which is not immediately clear.
Bookmark Us! Stay tuned to the Writer's Shack for more expert coverage like this.
FunFact: Handball, as currently played, has been part of the Olympics since 1972. Women got in in 1976. A similar game, played on a field, was held at the Berlin Games in 1936.
GREAT MOMENTS IN THE DEATH PENALTY: On this date in 1890 convicted murderer William Kemmler became the first person executed in the electric chair, at Auburn Hills Prison in New York.
It did not go well. He was woken up at 5am, actually fed breakfast before being afforded an opportunity to pray and have his head shaved. He was taken into the execution chamber at 6:38am. The first charge of 1,000 volts for 17 seconds didn't kill him, so they tried 2,000 volts the second time. Kemmler bled and some witnesses said he caught fire and some in the chamber were nauseated by the smell of burning flesh.
Quotebook: Noted electrician George Westinghouse said:
"They would have been better off using an axe".
Editor's Note: In order to fully rub in the fact it's been one-tenth of a millennium since the Chicago Cubs have won the World Series, On This Date is pleased to take a look back at the 1908 Chicago Cubs season.
Let's Lose Two! On this date, in 1908, the Cubs lost at Philadelphia to the Phillies, 7-5 and 5-3. The Pirates won, defeating the dreaded Braves 9-1, so the Cubs lose a game-and-a-half and are now in third place, three games behind the Pirates and a game-and-a-half behind the Giants. If we didn't know the Cubs would end up winning the World Series in October, we'd be worried.
Dry, Technical Matter: After a day off the Cubs will open a three-game set in New York on Aug. 8.
If You Can't Stand The Heat: On this date, in 1945, the United States dropped an atomic bomb on Hiroshima, Japan, mankind's first nuclear strike.
Thought For The Day: "In view of my responsibilities, I have lost some of my freedom of speech." - IOC President Jacques Rogge
Answer To The Last Trivia Question: The last trivia question was rhetorical. There is no correct answer.
Today's Stumper: What is the only country not on the European land mass to win the Olympic team handball gold medal. - Answer next time!
Threats? Recipes? Trivia question answers? Email The Writer's Shack Here!
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