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The Human Zoo/October 5, 2011
By Gaylon Kent
The Writer's Shack
Notes from around The Human Experience...
BUENOS DIAS: Because the Writer's Shack remains committed to endorsing Ron Paul for president when we feel like getting around to it, we're not paying a whole lot of attention to the Republican presidential candidates but we checked in on Texas Governor Rick Perry a couple of days ago and saw where he said sure, he'd be open to sending US troops to Mexico to help that nation fight drug cartels.
Oh Jesus H: Fabulous, just we need, another right-wing Christian zealot Texas governor who wants to go invading sovereign nations.
Listen Up: Governor, here's a way to end the violence right now: legalize drugs.
We've discussed this before here: does anybody seriously believe that such violence would continue over something that is legal? Do gangs fight it out on the border over coffee? No, of course they don't. Coffee's legal. There's no reason to fight it out because anybody who wants to sell coffee in the United States simply has to find a market for it and truck it across the border. There's no need to shove balloons of coffee up people's rear ends, or hide cans of Folgers in false compartments of cars and there is certainly no need to fight it out with the authorities.
Get Your Official Writer's Shack Policy Right Here: The purpose of government is to provide for the liberty of its citizens. What people do in the privacy of their own home is their business, not yours, not mine not the governments, not anyone else's. The war on drugs is like virtually every other war this nation has fought since War II: pointless and unwon.
Not only that, unlike other wars, this one is completely unwinnable. Some Americans use drugs, and those who supply it are going to whatever it takes to move their product to their customers. We're not stopping it, and we're trying pretty hard.
Question: Why are we unable and unwilling to heed the lessons of history? Hell, not only History, but lessons being taught to us right now? Criminalizing booze didn't work in the 1920's and criminalizing drugs isn't working now. You cannot eliminate a behavior simply by criminalizing it. All you do is drive it underground, obliging otherwise honest citizens to get their fix from criminals.
NOT THE UPSET OF THE YEAR: Official Writer's Shack faves the All Blacks, New Zealand's national rugby team, wrapped up pool play at the 2011 Rugby World Cup over the weekend, destroying Canada 79-15.
Somebody Get Us A Period, Please: It didn't really matter, of course, because our All Blacks had already wrapped up the top spot in Pool A and were playing, and winning, more or less out of habit because winning is what our All Blacks, do except for the quarterfinals of the 2007 World Cup when they lost to the goddamned French, not that we remember or are bitter anything like that because we destroyed the French in exciting Pool A action earlier in the tournament and we'll destroy them again if we meet them in the finals, which we're not because France won't make it that far, though you can rest assured our All Blacks will.
Back On Message: Our All Blacks will take on Argentina in the quarterfinals on October 9. After destroying Argentina they will face the winners of the South Africa/Australia match, which may well end up being the best match of the quarterfinals.
Oh Yeah: The quarterfinals get underway on October 8, with England going through the motions and beating France, Ireland and Wales meet in the other quarterfinal.
YEAH, I'M BAD: Pud Galvin becomes the first player in major league history to win 300 games on this date in 1888. Pitching for the Pittsburgh Pirates, then known as the Alleghenys, defeats the Washington Senators, 5-1.
Up, Up And Away: Wilbur Wright sets a new world record by flying an airplane 24 miles in 39 minutes, 36.92 miles per hour - near Dayton, Ohio on this date in 1905. The 39 minutes was longer than the cumulative time of all flights they made in 1903 and 1904 and showed conclusively that an airplane could be flown in any direction under control of a pilot and land safely. In fact, Wilbur brought the plane down only because Flyer III ran out of gas.
More Great Moments In Aviation: The first instance of one airplane shooting down another in combat occurs in World War I on this date in 1914. Piloted by Sergeant Joseph France and Corporal Louis Quenault, a French plane shoots down a German plane in the air over northeastern France.
My Fellow Americans: Harry Truman becomes the first president of the United States to address the nation from on television on this date in 1945. Truman asked his fellow citizens to cut back on their grain consumption, to aid Europeans still reeling from famine. The number of American households that actually had a tee vee in 1945 numbered in the thousands.
Great Moments In Something Or Another: The first high five is performed on this date in 1977 in game 2 of the National League Championship Series when Glenn Burke of the Los Angeles Dodgers greets teammate Dusty Baker, who is returning to the dugout after hitting a grand slam home run, by extending a hand in the air, and act Baker did too, completing the gesture by clasping Burke's hand. The Dodgers won the game 7-1, and would win the series three games to one.
Slow News Day: Willie Wilson of the Kansas City Royals establishes a new major league record with his 705th at-bat on this date in 1980. Though still the American League record, the big league mark was broken by Jimmy Rollins of Philadelphia, who had 716 at-bats in 2007.
Double Your Pleasure: Barry Bonds of San Francisco breaks the record for most home runs in a season on this date in 2001, connecting in the first inning of Chan Ho Park of the Los Angeles Dodgers.
The Dodgers won the game, 11-10 in four hours and 27 minutes, the longest nine-inning game in major league history to date. The record was broken, too, in 2006 when New York and Boston required four hours and 45 minutes to play a nine-inning game.
Thought For The Day: I think we should be men first and subjects second. - Henry David Thoreau
Answer To The Last Trivia Question: Fort Clinton, at West Point, New York, was the garrison that American Benedict Arnold and Brit John Andre were planning to turnover to the British in the Revolutionary War. It is now the site of the US Military Academy, and little of the original fort remains.
Today's Stumper: Who broke Wilbur Wright's air speed world record? - Answer next time!
Comments? Recipes? Complaints? Email the Writer's Shack here!
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