The Bottom Ten/NFL Week 3
By Gaylon Kent
The Writer's Shack
September 16, 2015
It's full speed ahead for the usual Bottom Ten suspects, as Washington retains their preseason number one ranking, impressing Bottom Ten pollsters with their ability lose games where they actually play pretty well, key in the heated race for the Bottom Ten medal stand.
This week's mess, as the nags limp out of the starting gate:
1. Washington Redskins (0-1; lost to Miami 17-10) - Redskins show mettle of B-10 champions, allowing one touchdown and only 74 yards rushing and still losing …Redskins show special teams fully one-third of game, securing loss by allowing fourth quarter punt return for TD…Next Loss: St Louis
2. Jacksonville Jaguars (0-1; lost to Carolina 20-9) - Strong second half key, as Jaguars, keyed by turnovers, turn on afterburners, getting outscored 10-0…With loss Sunday, Jaguars can start season 0-2 for fourth (4th) consecutive season…Next Loss: Miami
3. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (0-1; lost to Tennessee 42-14) - Tampa Bay gets ruining of new QB off to great start with blowout loss to defending B-10 champs…Already trailing 35-14 at half, Buccaneers put game on ice in third quarter, punting on first three (3) possessions…Next Loss: at New Orleans
4. Cleveland Browns (0-1; lost to New York Jets 31-10) - Four fumbles and an interception insure Browns get quest for first B-10 title off to flying start…B-10 pollsters "virtually certain: Browns first team in a "really long time" to rush for more than 100 yards (104) and still have more penalty yards (109) than rushing yards…Next Loss: Tennessee
5. AFC North (1-3) - Easy pick for Marv Levy Broach, issued to AFC's worst division…Division currently paced by B-10 regulars Cincinnati, everybody else winless…Next Loss: Status as NFL division, as league looking to farm them out, but Sun Belt Conference doesn't even want them.
6. NFC North (1-4) - Claims first Ray Malavasi Pin of 2015, issued to NFC's worst division…While unlikely Bears, Lions and Vikings will all finish season winless, B-10 pollsters hoping for best…Or worst, in this case…Gets nod over NFC East, despite East having Tony Romo quarterbacking one of its teams.
7. Oakland Raiders (0-1; lost to Cincinnati 33-13) - Game not as close as score indicates, as Raiders don't score till game safely out of reach, trailing 33-0…Like five (5) of last six (6) predecessors, new coach Jack Del Rio establishes immediate street cred with Raiders fan(s) desperate for B-10 title by losing first game…Next Loss: Baltimore
8. Baltimore Ravens (0-1; lost to Denver 19-13) - Ravens still not entirely sure how they annoyed schedule maker, starting season with consecutive trips to Western time zones...Fortunately, game vs. Raiders actually looked at more of a vacation than regular league game…Next Loss: at Oakland
Editor's Note: faced with deadlines and bar tab that was about to be shut off, there are only eight (8) teams ranked this week.
This Week's Clash of the Titans: Detroit at Minnesota
This Is Don Criqui Reporting:Miami at Jacksonville
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